In a recent Queenwood seminar,
Unpacking the World of a Tweenager for Year 5 parents, a valuable and poignant discussion ensued. The conversation was somewhat inspired by recent media coverage, with reference to the prominence of smartphone usage, particularly social network platforms, in many young girls’ lives.
In Jonathan Haidt’s recent book,
The Anxious Generation, he describes the widespread transition from play-based activities to the phone-based rewiring of childhood, and the alarming implications on the mental health of teenagers and increasingly pre-teenagers, particularly girls. He draws a direct correlation between the widespread uptake of the smart phone between 2010 and 2024, and the declining mental health of young people. Haidt investigates the nature of childhood, including why children need play and independent exploration to mature into competent, thriving adults.
Haidt points out that time spent on phones largely on social media has interfered with children’s social and neurological development, affecting everything from sleep deprivation to poor focus, addiction, loneliness, social contagion, social comparison and perfectionism. He provides statistics about ‘tweenager’ (10 – 14 years old) ownership of smart phones without use-restrictions, drawing pre-teenagers away from the real world into the virtual world. It was Haidt’s recommendation that led us to view
this shocking but incredibly useful YouTube talk by Catherine Price about how parents can effectively set limits in the new normal that is upon us. It is well worth a watch.
Dr Kristy Goodwin, a renowned expert in the field of digital wellbeing, provides valuable and accessible advice for parents and caregivers. In her most recent book,
Dear Digital...We need to talk...., she implores parents and carers to manage digital activity more effectively, pointing out the serious ramifications this can have on physical health and mental wellbeing if not monitored. Goodwin advises parents to establish boundaries and healthy digital habits; ensure their child’s basic needs (relationships, sleep, physical movement) are not unduly impacted by digital use and to promote boredom in childhood, providing time to daydream and unplug.
At the Junior School we have safe digital device use guidelines for the girls, including for social media and smart phones, and we hope that the following advice and suggestions for parents will enable us together to support our girls as they navigate the often complex and confronting social media realm.
Girls:
- Leave phones and smart watches with their teacher each day
- Sign the ICT User Agreement: Junior 3-6
- Work on digital devices at School with safety controls
- Are taught explicitly regarding age guidelines and pitfalls of safe social media use in Health and Wellbeing lessons
- Ensure healthy digital behaviour dialogue is a common thread in daily conversation
Note that our girls are all under 13 years old, the minimum guideline for social media platforms so should not be using any using social media (certainly without careful supervision/permission).
Parents:
- Adhere to social media age guidelines (usually 13+)
- Insist that all digital devices (iPhone, laptop, iPad, smart phones) are used in public areas of the home only, i.e. not in bedrooms
- Store digital devices in a central, secure place overnight
- Install parental controls, e.g. Family Zone or similar on all accessible devices. Apple: Set up Screen Time on iPhone – Apple Support (AU) or Set up Screen Time on iPhone – Apple Support (AU) Android: How to set up parental controls on Google Play - Google Play Help & Manage your child's screen time - Google For Families Help
- Adjust settings on iPhone so this can only be used for calls (and simple text message use)
- Purchase a ‘phone call only’ (or child’s) phone
- Agree as a cohort not to provide U13 girls with a smartphone (or purchase a phone not linked to the internet or a camera, i.e. a ‘dumb’ phone), examples can be found at these links: Officeworks or Amazon
- Monitor daughter’s digital activity
- Establish Boundaries; Boredom and Basics
- Model good digital device use, i.e. parents, no iPhones at mealtimes, during family activities, minimise use in the evenings
- Support less phone use, e.g. Phone Free Friday
- Refer to the website: Online safety | eSafety Commissioner
Research informs us about the alarming impact on the mental health of teenagers and increasingly pre-teenagers (particularly girls) when digital device use goes unchecked. We are fortunate to belong to a Community where we can use evidence from these studies to work together to carefully manage the use of social media to promote the healthy childhood development of our girls.