Wellbeing is at the forefront of our minds. Teachers across the School are planning group activities and working with the girls individually to help the whole community stay active, focused and positive. Collaborative activities planned for the girls in the coming weeks build on discussions that took place in Week 2 Wellbeing lessons in the Senior School where girls were asked to consider an ancient Roman quotation:
The chief task in life is simply this: to identify and separate matters so that I can say clearly to myself which are externals not under my control, and which have to do with the choices I actually control. Where then do I look for good and evil? Not to uncontrollable externals, but within myself to the choices that are my own… Epictetus, Discourses, 2.5.4–5
This is a quotation from the Stoics; the name derives from the porch (stoa poikilê) in Athens where members of the school congregated for lectures and learning. Essentially, proponents of the philosophy believe that wisdom stems from the ability to differentiate between that which we cannot change and that which is within our power to influence. This type of wisdom offers us good sense, good judgment, quick-wittedness, discretion, and resourcefulness, all values essential to individual and collective wellbeing.
The colloquial use of the word stoic is equivalent to what contemporary psychologists refer to as naïve optimism: gritting one’s teeth and ignoring the circumstances in order to weather the storm. But, for all their faults, the Stoics encouraged a far more effective practice. They considered their philosophy to be an exercise (askêsis), or what contemporary psychologists call wise optimism. This is how you practice wise optimism:
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reflect on your current circumstances;
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identify and accept that which you cannot change; and
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adjust your attitudes, actions, or your treatment of others, to bring about positive change.
There is substantial research that routinely engaging in wise optimism improves life expectancy, motivation and productivity.
So, what did this look like in my Week 2 Wellbeing lesson? It is clear from the reflections of my Year 11 Tutor group that they are taking intentional steps in order to remain optimistic: they are identifying circumstances out of their control, accepting them, and then focusing on activities that create positive change.
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I miss playing team sport, but I now have time for driving lessons with Dad.
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I don’t like learning online, but I do like having more quiet time to read and practise my French Horn.
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I miss my friends, but I love having time to walk my dog in the mornings and see the sunrise.
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I don’t like being inside, but I love hot lunches with my family… and I’ve made a promise to myself that I’ll leave my bedroom more next week.
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Looking at a screen all day makes me tired, but I can sleep in and wear my Ugg boots under the desk.
The pessimist complains about the wind. The optimist expects it to change. The realist adjusts the sails. William Arthur Ward
If you’d like to support your daughter in navigating the windy conditions in which we find ourselves, or if you need a bit more wise optimism in your own life, you may wish to look into some upcoming programs with the wonderful Gillian Coutts. Gillian is from the Potential Project and has worked with our staff and Executive team for several years. Following the success of her Resilient Mindset program arranged by the QPA last year, Gillian is offering a free short five day reset email-program available to parents in the second week of August. For information, or to sign up, click here.